That comment put me off dating for a long time. That guy didn't say anything else – it was in passing when he left – and I never saw him or heard from him again. And so I was back to never even trying to get intimate with strangers or people who don't know me fully. The reaction to my old penis was usually surprise or fascination from anything close to hookups. I was made to feel less male – because of nature. Because I was taught that my original penis was too small or not good enough. I've also got a prosthetic device built in which would be pumped up for sex. Phalloplasty was a way for me to have a "normal" body – except it's not very normal because it's created from my forearm. I didn't know why it was such a big deal but I knew that it was something not to talk about, hence the shame, stigma and embarrassment. Growing up, I just thought I had a small penis and that doctors were really interested in it. While everyone I've actually managed to hook up with has had a great time, those guys have been few and far between 'cause I tend to get blocked on Grindr as soon as I send a dick pic. If you're hung, lots of guys want to sleep with you just for that if you're poorly-endowed, you have to either get to the point of a hookup without dick size coming up or convince someone that you're good enough for them to "put up with" your shortcomings. The problem with being an un-hung top is actually scoring a hook-up in the first place. So my confidence promptly went right back down the tubes and I've sort of given up since then. When I followed up, he said he wasn't really enjoying sex because he could barely feel it and he'd prefer not to meet up again. He ended up flaking on me for one appointment. We met up a few times and did the whole "boyfriend experience" thing, which helped restore some of the self-confidence I'd been losing due to the constant rejections. I ended up hiring an escort a few months back to break a many-year dry spell. But I can’t lie: I was silent and escorted him out. Only men with big cocks can fuck me.” I stood in amazement and wish I could say I sternly told him to go fuck himself. No way are you hung and you’re not thick enough. When he had come, I asked if everything was okay and he said, “Yeah, just wished you’d not lied about your cock size. He looked at me and said he wanted me to finish him off I obliged. I was hard but nervous about it because of all the build-up from the previous days’ messaging. He pulled me up and told me to fully strip. We started to get naked but I kept my pants on and started to suck his (not huge but bigger than mine) cock. He came over one evening after work and was exactly what I wanted: "straight-acting" with a girlfriend at home.
I’m a grower not a shower so I sent a few snaps when I was fully erect, making sure the angle showed it off to its full potential. I did my best to keep the mystery but I really wanted to meet him as he fulfilled one of my fantasies: the bi builder.
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